Saturday, May 24, 2008

Jury Duty Update

Well, I report for jury duty Tuesday morning at 8:45, downtown in civic center somewhere. I will park where I park to go to the ballet and opera, or so I have been directed on their recording, and walk over. I am hoping to be able to spend the one day there and that be it. I hope that they find me undesirable for their jury. 

If it is a DUI case, I plan on telling them that I have three children and do NOT drink because of that. I do not believe in drinking and driving AT ALL. I have no tolerance for alcohol nor people who get behind the wheel drunk. That is sure to get me disqualified. Luckily, no one from my youth will be there to testify against me. Nor will I be hooked up to any kind of machine that will give me away. Don't get me wrong, I don't really drink, unless it is an occasion or I am out to dinner with friends or family. I never drink at home, I just don't. I have migraines. I have no tolerance for alcohol anymore, that part is true. I don't agree with driving drunk, that is also true. 

I have thought I could say something extreme like "Fry everyone!!!" Of course I don't I don't feel that way. But who would want some lunatic on a jury saying that?! Or how about I judge people based on their looks...Eww, yeah, that's another beaut! Ok, I can't say that as a therapist. I would have to stick with hoping they don't want friends of cops on the jury. I think they care about that anymore. 

People have suggested making racial remarks. I can't do that. I would never make a statement like that ever. 
So short of that, I have to come up with something that will make neither side want me in their jury. 
That is what I will be thinking about until all weekend.

Happy Memorial Day weekend to you all!



Michelle said...

LOL - so how did it go?
Did you get thrown out of jury duty?


Tawnya said...

This made me laugh so hard.... "Fry Em all and let God sort em out!!!" is always a good line to yell out.... or just blirt it out really fast...